Paul Reubens Reveals His True Self in Posthumous Documentary 'Pee-wee as Himself'
Paul Reubens, the beloved actor best known for his iconic character Pee-wee Herman, opened up about his private life and struggles in a posthumous documentary titled Pee-wee as Himself. The film, which premiered at the 2025 Sundance Film Festival, features over 40 hours of interviews with Reubens, conducted by director Matt Wolf. Reubens, who died of cancer in July 2023 at age 70, revealed for the first time that he was gay and had kept his sexuality hidden throughout his career.
In the documentary, Reubens shared that he had a boyfriend named Guy before his rise to fame, and that Guy’s vocal quirks inspired some of Pee-wee Herman’s famous catchphrases. However, as his career took off, Reubens chose to conceal his personal life, stating, “I was out of the closet, and then I went back in the closet. I wasn’t pursuing the Paul Reubens career; I was pursuing the Pee-wee Herman career.” He also spoke about the pain of seeing Guy die of AIDS, describing it as a deeply emotional experience.
Reubens’ career was marked by both immense success and scandal. His 1985 film Pee-wee’s Big Adventure and the children’s show Pee-wee’s Playhouse made him a household name, but his image was tarnished by a 1991 arrest for indecent exposure at an adult movie theater, to which he pleaded no contest. A second arrest in 2002, involving charges of possessing obscene material, further damaged his reputation. Reubens maintained that the images in question were vintage erotica, and the charges were eventually dropped, but the incidents left a lasting impact on his life and career.
In his final audio recording, made the day before his death, Reubens expressed his desire for the documentary to show the world who he truly was. “More than anything, the reason I wanted to make a documentary was for people to see who I really am, and how painful and dreadful it was to be labeled something I wasn’t,” he said. “To be labeled a pariah; to have people be scared of you, or untrusting.”
The documentary also highlights Reubens’ complex relationship with his alter ego, Pee-wee Herman, and his lifelong struggle to balance his public persona with his private identity. Despite the challenges, Reubens’ legacy as a groundbreaking comedian and performer endures, with Pee-wee as Himself offering a poignant and revealing look at the man behind the bow tie. The film is set to stream on HBO later this year.
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