Allison Holker Reflects on Stephen 'tWitch' Boss's Life and Legacy After Ayahuasca Journey

2025-02-28

Allison Holker, widow of the late Stephen “tWitch” Boss, revealed that her husband underwent a profound change after participating in an ayahuasca journey prior to his death in December 2022. Speaking on The Jamie Kern Lima Show, Holker shared that the experience marked a significant turning point for Boss, but he “never healed” from it. She described noticing a shift in him, stating, “I feel like his heart was never really in the same place when he came back. There was something missing in his eyes.”

Ayahuasca, a plant-based psychedelic brew traditionally used in South American shamanic practices, is known for inducing intense emotional and hallucinogenic experiences. Holker believes the journey opened something within Boss that he struggled to process, leaving lasting emotional scars. Despite his ability to find joy and maintain daily routines, she sensed an unresolved inner turmoil.

Holker, who shares three children with Boss, reflected on the challenges of navigating his legacy while supporting their children, who are in therapy to cope with their father’s death. She emphasized the importance of honoring Boss’s memory while acknowledging the pain his choices caused. “I will always celebrate Stephen, but I also have to be careful because I can’t celebrate so much of his choice,” she said.

In her memoir, This Far: My Story of Love, Loss, and Embracing the Light, Holker aims to share her story to help others recognize warning signs of mental health struggles. She hopes her openness will prevent similar tragedies, stating, “I believe that if Stephen were able to choose, he would choose to have his story told if it meant saving even one life.”

Boss, a beloved DJ and dancer, died by suicide at age 40, leaving behind a legacy of joy and creativity. Holker continues to advocate for mental health awareness, working with organizations like the National Alliance on Mental Illness to educate others.

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